twenty-six things I learned in twenty-sixteen

1.  It's okay to get angry sometimes
2. It's normal to not immediately like everyone you meet
3. The first step to hearing God is to be quiet and listen
4. It doesn't hurt to swallow  your pride and stubbornness once in awhile
5. Friends are worth more than sleep
6. Nothing is ever quite as bad as it seems--whether it's your appearance, your skills, or that thing you've been dreading
7. It's normal for feelings about someone to keep changing
8. Sometimes, you just need to cry after months of not
9. Just because something is painful or difficult doesn't mean you should give up
10. If you truly love something, never let it become a chore
11. Find the people that you love and that love you, and never let them go
12. Failing is okay
13. Little kids say the funniest things
14. Ballet is a tough sport for tough people
15. Sometimes, places you've never been feel more like home than anywhere
16. Cats are the best cuddlers
17. The internet is great, but so is Shakespeare
18. If you pretend to be patient with someone, eventually you won't have to pretend anymore
19. Nobody ever said pointe was easy
20. Sometimes you just gotta sit, listen, smile, and nod
21. Everybody is a person, don't forget to treat them like one
22. Don't pay attention if someone criticizes your taste in anything
23. If at first you don't succeed, stubbornness and determination work wonders
24. Everyone has 'bad' days, and 'bad' is relative
25. If you want something, you'd better be willing to work hard and be more determined than ever
26. Try new things that terrify you. You might like it, you might not. What matters is that you tried.

This is a list I started writing in the end of November to share on here. Looking back on this year, it's been such a year of growth for me--in some good and probably some not so good ways. 

2016 has been a curveball I don't think anyone was expecting. We lost a lot of people that everyone loved. There were shootings and attacks and simple matters of old age. 

But there were good things that came out of 2016, too. New books that rekindled old joy, reboots of old tv shows, new albums, new movies, new Olympic athletes that kicked butt, new musicals, actors that finally won oscars. 

And great things happened for me, personally. I'm on pointe now, since February. I got to act and dance and dabble in the arts more than usual. I pushed myself out of my comfort zone, and realized that some things are just not for me, but that that's okay. I had sleepovers and late-night talks that all of us needed. I got to know people more. I started wearing lots of sweatpants and sweaters, which was one of the best decisions of my life. I discovered new people that made me smile. I went to New York for the first time. I started writing more. I found new music tastes. New things to do with my hair. It's been a great trainwreck of a year. 

So here's to 2017-- that it's a better one, 

that we grow as a nation and as individuals, 

that people find God and how great he is, 

and that those who already have come to appreciate it more. 

2017, may you be a good one.

When Summer becomes Fall

This summer has been pretty cool. (Well, not literally cool in the slightest but I think you get what I mean)

It was full of dance recitals and 'youth' conferences and barbeques with friends before they left for college. There were lots of laughing kids involved (with babysitting and VBS) and also a pretty boss cover of We Are The Champions by Queen on the kazoo. I camped with friends, had those all-important 2am talks that everyone needs once in awhile, and made more weird inside jokes that make no sense.

We also road-tripped to Gettysburg and D.C. and Philadelphia and I took lots of cool pictures (although I kinda managed to break the camera's auto-focus. Whoops)

This is like my favorite picture I took the entire week

We went all over Washington D.C. (I was grumpy almost the whole time, just ask my family) and we saw the Washington Monument (I have several failed pictures out a window of this) and we also got to see the Changing of the Guard at Arlington National Cemetery, which was definitely a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

One of my failed out-of-the-window attempts

I want to mention that the reason I was grumpy the whole time was the fact that WASHINGTON D.C. WAS SO HOT like it actually got to 100 degrees at one point.

Awesome recycled jellyfish I found

Also, I went to a zoo for the first time! Well, the first time in my memory. My favorite part of that was probably the small mammal house and also the panda that sleeps exactly like I do

Can confirm

And this tiny little fennec fox that was adorable

But I guess everything has to end. Including summer.

We have to leave behind the great memories and laughs and thoughts that yeah, this was the best summer yet because of this thing called SCHOOL that I started on Monday so yeah my life is different now.

And even though summer is essentially over now, there's always more to do. One more beach day. One more sleepover. And even after that, fall brings its own perks and more memories to be made. Nutcracker auditions are the 10th and although I'm really hoping for Mother Ginger, I can't wait for whatever roles I get to start rehearsing.

My brother and I head down to Easterns again in the end of September, which is always a guaranteed amazing time. I mean, throw a large group of teenagers into a state fair for a weekend with a few chaperones, what could go wrong? Actually not that much because the chaperones are great but just make sure you don't drink a frappe that messes with your stomach for the entire day.

I guess I'm really just excited for fall weather because it means I can wear scarves and sweaters and sweatpants all day every day. Also the smell of fall is my favorite smell in the world.

And it also means that October and spooky crafts with 4-H is coming.

Anyyyway, I hope you've all had a great summer and you're all geared up for an even better fall! (even with school and everything starting) Leave me a comment with your favorite part of summer!

And now this picture I took at an art museum that made me laugh really hard. Enjoy.

Things never happen the way you want them to

Surprise! Me again. After approximately 3 months and 3 days.

Yeah, it's been awhile.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you guys what I've been up to lately.

Last week was my church's Vacation Bible School (VBS) Back in March, I was asked to lead music for everyone and of course, I accepted! It had kinda been a dream of mine to be music leader, so I was pretty thrilled to be doing it. I asked a friend to help me so we did the first three days together and the remaining two another church member helped me.

I had such an amazing time with all of the groups and leaders. The Pre-K class (lead by my mom) was adorable and I was extremely proud of everyone at the closing program.

But, like everything, it had to end. It feels really weird, like the end of a show or something. I miss getting up and being the first one into the church and setting up my computer with the projector. I miss making a complete fool of myself in front of 25 kids while singing and rocking out to VBS music. I miss that one part in Learning to be the Light where we 'dab' (it's not a legit dab cause I hate them but it should be the new one). I really miss the Pre-K class and hugs and adorable giggles as they ran their fingers through my really long hair.

After my friend left on the third day, I started to get kinda depressed, thinking ugh, this is gonna be so weird and now I have to do all the signs and singing by myself. But that night I got over it and told myself, yeah, it was fun, but not everything has to be the same. Just go out there and have fun, serve God, and enjoy the experience. So I did, and it was still amazing. The song I'm currently listening to that I realize completely sums up my feelings about the whole week is this.

The reason I decided to write this post and make another appearance was YouTube, I guess. I find inspiration in weird places. In this case, it was this channel. I was watching some of their older videos that majorly reminded me of Music Man, weirdly enough. I was shown some of their videos around that time and it just made me feel really happy and nostalgic. Specifically Thundersnow. I had this ridiculous grin on my face and tears (?) in my eyes. For some reason, it really made me think of all of the amazing memories that I made during that time. Weird, right?

I guess the point of this post is me getting over things ending and accepting that yeah, things have to end. But that doesn't mean that you have to mope and be grumpy for the next two months. Enjoy stuff while it happens because life is beautiful. And it's okay to look forward to next year. Yeah, I miss VBS and all of my play people every time I hear certain songs but I'm thrilled for the next thing life throws at me and excited for next year. (Also, Anne of Green Gables happened and I might write a post about it soon)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I have absolutely no idea what this post was supposed to be but I imagined it not being like this? Oh well. Life doesn't turn out how you want, and neither do my blog posts. Like, ever. But anyway, stay tuned for some possible 30 day challenges over the summer!  

And here's a picture that I took on our camping trip this year. It's very American and I love it. 

Joeeeeeeeeeee

Okay y'all, listen down, sit up (sit down, listen up?) cause I'm gonna tell you about my brother.

This is my bro, Joe. (I'm such a poet) He's pretty awesome. And today happens to be his birthday so yeah.

Joe has been my partner in crime for as long as I can remember. This one year, I pretty much had him spy for me and report what my family was getting me for my birthday.

Until, of course, he got caught and tattled on me. Amateur.

Anyway, I've gotten over that. In the meantime, he's passed me in height (he's roughly 8 1/2 inches taller than me now). Of course, he wastes no time in teasing and flaunting his superior size but oh well. If it's the price I have to pay to have such an amazing little brother then I'm honestly 100% okay with it.

Joe is probably the person in the world that I'm the most comfortable with. We're so stinking close that judging each other is pretty much only a joke. We know that we're stuck with each other for the rest of our lives so we might as well get along and enjoy it.

Whether its comparing biceps, taking candid selfies, making grotesque faces, or having hardcore rap battles, we always get along [relatively] well for a brother and sister that see each other almost every minute of every day. 

So Joe, even though I may not always show it or be extremely happy with you, I love you so much. You're my best friend and little brother rolled up into one 5'9" person obsessed with basketball and determined to hate everything I love. You're epic, man.

Here's to many more<3

And now for some cheesy selfies pretty much summing up our relationship:

For when you feel like you don't deserve it

Do you ever just take a second and look at your life and realize how amazing it is?

I mean, seriously, what did I ever do to deserve these five amazing, crazy people I am blessed to call my family?

Or what about the ridiculous, somewhat overprotective but nonetheless caring group of people that are my best friends?

How about this main role in Music Man? How did I get it? I don't deserve it, there are other people who could have done it. People with stronger voices that don't crack every time they go higher than a C#. I don't know why I got it, but I did.

There was a time I felt that I didn't fit in with my family, but know I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't in this family. I don't deserve this, don't deserve my friends or family or cats or anything.

So what on earth did I do to get them?

But I guess that's just it. I didn't do anything. And I never could, because I'm a sinner. It's only Something amazingly un-earthly that could have caused me to get this.

It's Jesus.

And that's what He does. He took our shame, and screw-ups, and every bit of sin and gave us things we could never deserve. Family that loves us. Friends that come to see your shows and stay for a half hour to talk afterwards. Main roles that you don't feel that you were good enough for.

Is this His way of telling us that even though we feel worthless sometimes, we are worth it to Him?

Even if we yell at our siblings and stomp around and get mad for no reason before shows or our voices crack during the really dramatic part of the song, we matter. We are worth it. Because Jesus loves us.

I don't deserve this, and I don't pretend that I do. But it's been given to me. It's a blessing, and an amazing one at that, so I'm going to live it out. Especially with time seeming to go so fast, I want to hold onto it and treasure every moment. Even the painful ones where I feel like nobody cares and the joyful ones filled with hugs and laughter.

I'm want to live every second like I mean it, like it's a special gift from God.

Which, I guess, it is.


--------------------------------

This is my first post of the new year! It's crazy that it's 2016 already. I was on YouTube the other day and I looked at the date of an old video and it was 2012, so I was like, "Okay, it's not too old, 2 years" and then I realized that it would be 4 years old by now...yeah.

My life has been pretty crazy lately with dance, Music Man (final show tonight, though,) and school, but in the next few weeks things will get less hectic and will [hopefully] settle into a more laid-back routine.

And now, koala, because I have no better pictures and no life.